Spread collars are a tool of the devil

The seditious dissemination of spread collars has me in a snit. The basic fact is this: These are not for everyone. They are not interchangeable with straight narrow collars, and anyone who suggests otherwise is itching for a fight.

The ideal essential concept behind shapes and styles of clothing is that the clothing is designed to reshape your body into a more pleasing form. If it weren’t then we’d all be wearing togas. Collar spread is a perfect representative of the concept. Straight collars elongate the face and are suited to those of us with a rounded visage. Spread collars work when we want to round out a thin or elongated face.

Medium or Jermyn spread

OK. You have a tie that is perfect for a full Windsor knot. The medium to Jermyn spread collar is the correct frame. I like the medium. Having a rounded face, I can still wear the shirt with a regular tie without looking like I’m about to take flight.

The British Spread

I see Tony Blair wearing these and my faith in British democracy crumbles. Stop it Tony! It just isn’t for you. Back in the day, a good tailor in Jermyn Street would have put a stop to this. Let loose in Marks & Sparks without guidance, New Labour is showing its roots.

The Artisan, the Como, and other heresies

Refer to the above diatribe. There is a fitting place for all things in the universe. That place just may not be your closet.